LeBron James, Chris Paul, Dwyane Wade and Carmelo Anthony sure could use a vacation right now. (I’m sorry.) The NBA’s most famous foursome of friends have each experienced their own unique brand of misery during the first month of the new year, a rare moment in NBA time that’s seen the four stars make headlines for not ideal reasons. Who has had it the worst so far? Welcome to the first (and likely only) edition of the Banana Boat Crew Misery Index.
The Most Miserable: Dwyane Wade
It hurts me to see Dwyane like this. Miami has highs in the '70s this week, while Chicago is a solid 40 degrees colder. In addition to that risking parka budget, Wade is now in the middle of a full-blown bleep-show in Chicago. The problems really started this summer, when the Bulls front office added two headstrong, poor-outside-shooting guards in Wade and Rajon Rondo to the roster. Wade said all the right things about the pairing at the time, but his frustrations with Chicago’s middling record blew over this week, when he and Jimmy Butler publicly criticized the team, calling out some players for their lack of effort. Wade threw in some curse words for good measure, and was reportedly upset with Nikola Mirotic and Michael Carter-Williams for their shot selection.
With Wade already upset with a) his teammates b) his team’s record and c) Midwest winters are no joke, Rondo added fuel to the fire with a ludicrous Instagram post about how his veteran teammates in Boston would have never acted the way Wade (and Butler) did. This is the same Rajon Rondo who admitted to not playing defense at the end of his tenure with the Celtics, who was so hated in Dallas that his teammates voted against giving him a playoff share and who was deemed too dysfunctional to play for the Sacramento Kings.
So yes, it’s a complete clown-show in Chicago. You have to imagine Wade is pretty fed up, and his superfriends at least have the comfort of a lot more money coming their way. Wade has one year left on his deal with the Bulls. He can opt out, but he's unlikely to make as much on the open market. Wade will basically have to choose between money or misery in the off-season. This is practically a real-life version of Wade’s “Get Me Out Of Here!” commercial.
Should Be Used To The Misery: Carmelo Anthony
It’s not that I don’t feel bad for Carmelo Anthony, but he should at least be comfortable in his current environment, because the Knicks only exist in various stages of chaos under the stewardship of owner James Dolan. Melo has been involved in numerous trade rumors of late, which actually makes sense for the Knicks, who should have been building around Kristaps Porzingis before signing Joakim Noah and trading for Derrick Rose. The trade rumors are one thing, but Melo also has to deal with Phil Jackson, who has been taking shots at Anthony throughout the season, and Phil Jackson’s friend Charley Rosen, who wrote a takedown of Anthony earlier this month.
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